Thursday, December 02, 2004

So it is the final two week push until the end of the semester and I can't seem to get motivated. I can't remember when my downhill slide began specifically, but I think I can pinpoint the cause.

I think it began when I came to the realization that Significant Other (SO and who shall forever remain unnamed and did I mention Jackass with a capital J) perhaps did not feel as strongly as I did, or might have (I won't admit it damnit!). So, since then I have run almost the whole gamut of loss. What is it...Let me see.....Denial (not the river duh), sadness, anger, back to sadness, does despondent come next?

I thought picking up the old blog and bitching about it here might be the smart and cathartic thing to do. I wonder if it is working yet. Maybe I should type like another million billion words and then that will be the right recipe to help me get off my ass and study so I don't get stinking "C's" in my classes this semester. UGH!

Okay, I have said this before to those who know me best, but this time I mean it. Pay attention, here it comes...

I will not, allow anyone's desires trump my own.

Thank you.

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